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Healthy Doesn’t Mean Whole

I like the way I feel when I’m eating right and exercising. I feel so alive, I feel healthy! But have you ever considered that being healthy on the outside doesn’t mean you’re whole on the inside?

“Do you want to be made whole?” Jesus asked this very question to the the people at the Pool of Bethesda. Have you ever wondered why Jesus asked this question to a man who had suffered his affliction for thirty-eight years?

Perhaps the question was about more than just physical healing. I think what Jesus was actually asking was, “Do you want to be complete? Do you really know what wholeness will mean, and the responsibility it will bring?”

Yes, God is our Healer but His desire is for us to be whole – body, soul and spirit. Along with needing physical healing, many of us have emotional brokenness and spiritual issues that prevent us from living in the fullness of God’s blessing. As humans, we tend to focus on and react more to the things that are going on around us but pay little attention to what is going on inside us.

When something is broken, it doesn’t function properly and when you are broken on the inside, you are much more vulnerable. Wholeness comes when you are willing to take on the responsibility to change on the inside and deal with the attitudes and mindsets that can hold you back from living a blessed life.

“The strong spirit of a man sustains him in bodily pain or trouble, but a weak and broken spirit who can raise up or bear?” Proverbs 18:14

How is your spirit? Are you hiding brokenness that you are too ashamed or overwhelmed to deal with? Do you want to be made whole?

Father, there is no limit to the wholeness you bring. Help me find the courage of faith to trust You with the areas of my inner life that need renewing so I can live a life of wholeness.

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The Sun & The Moon

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Last night I asked the Lord to shower me with His affections, to drown me in His undying love, to saturate my heart. Let this daughter not go unnoticed in this day. In my rest, I received a vision of the sun. Its radiance was in noble tints and tones, opulent oranges, glittering yellows, elegant embracing reds. It was a blazing, sweet warmth on my face. God told me He knows how I love the sun on my face, as I marveled and basked in its beauty. There is no color wheel that can contain the dyes I saw.

Then a vision of the moon, oh that moon! That moon! I had never seen a moon nearly like this before… I was close enough to see its depths… and everything in me was moved by its hues. I witnessed such grand magnificence… the purple that outlined its crevices, oh that purple… I’ve never seen purple like that before. Shades of striking red… glowing brilliant blues… the complexions cast were glorious… pure. In my captivated gaze of this moon, I awoke. Tender tears drenched my thoughts. The Maker of the Moon, the Maker of Me, My Beloved graced me with His mercy in a desperate moment for love.

Now that its morning, I realize, it’s the day of love, Valentine’s Day. I am overwhelmed at His expression of love for me. We have an amazing Father who listens to our requests and waits to drench our hearts in His love. I pray you feel His love above all else in this day.

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Encouraged In The Storms of Life

Over the last few months, I’ve been facing an increase in trials, and at the same time, receiving some divine appointments. Is it strange to same I’m encouraged in it? My pastor once said, “Don’t be scared when you face opposition or trials, be scared when you’re not.”   The devil wouldn’t be causing such a stir if we weren’t a threat to him. The closer we get to Christ, the hotter the devil turns up the heat.
“More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”  Romans 5:3-5
God allows these trials to strengthen our confidence in Him, as it provokes a walk in obedience to His word, so that, He can wean milk-drinkers off baby food and train them how to eat the meat of His word and be strengthened from the inside out by His Spirit.
I think sometimes when we find ourselves in a ‘situation’ and feel the heat, our natural inclination is to back out of it thinking we must have made a mistake, ‘for the favor of God doesn’t seem to be upon us’. But if we only understood the painful process Paul is referring to, I think we may press into the heat when everything of us wants to pull back. This is how God refines us by fire.
The confidence in what we cannot see should be a little uncomfortable at times; being stretched is how we grow. Following Christ is an unnatural transformation, from self-loving to sacrifice, from selfishness to serving others. Jesus tells us to ‘count the cost’ before deciding whether or not we want to follow Him.
What I’m experiencing is how to love God and love others with a drastically different, and unnatural, sacrificing love. It’s been a process. What I’m learning is how to ask God for hard things, expecting the hurricanes from hell to come wreaking havoc in what I claim as my life. However, the important part in these storms is this: that I’m not looking around for the quickest escape route. My trust is in God as we weather out the storms together.
God, never do I need you more than in the midst of these trials that toy with every emotion in me. My heart is deeply grieved, my joy saddened. This isn’t easy, sometimes seems not even fair. But I know you have something even deeper you’re working for your glory out of this. So I will choose to rejoice in this suffering, that your glory would triumph and be made known. You are victorious my King, and I claim your victory over any tribulation in my life. Amen.
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Love Actually

Love is a verb, an action, not a word. Love motivates us to do the ‘impossible’. Love operates in supernova strength; love can move mountains.

Love requires sacrifice. The value of something is determined by how much someone is willing to give up for it. The worth of a piece of wood is only as valuable as the sacrifice.

Love can be freely given, but is not cheap. The more we pay for it, the more we invest in greater care and protection over it.

Wherever you spend most of your time, thoughts, energy, is where your love is. Sometimes our love for something, someone is ‘unseen’ and we fool ourselves into determining its worth by what the world sees.

Love is death… to every will in our flesh. Love is crucifying everything else that tries to throne itself in the only place love should be. Love is concerning, it cares… about all the little things, not just the big stuff. Love actually, is Jesus, who didn’t care about appearances, or riches, or tomorrow. Love actually, is God who cares about even the hairs on your head. Love is His Truth, which testifies to the greatest commandment of all, love for Him. To love God is to know Him, trust Him, desire Him, follow Him, to want nothing more than Him. Love is higher than hope, peace or joy; it goes beyond the bad times and sees only His good. Love is steadfast, everlasting, ever present… never-ending, never escaping, never withering. Love actually, cares for the hearts of God’s people and presses in, it embraces when the circumstance hurts beyond what we can bear. Love is self-sacrificing and walks in complete abandonment to the world, it’s worries, it’s demands, it’s temptations to give up this sacrifice because ‘you can have what you need right now’ (Matthew 4).

My Jesus, you are the Love of my life… may I love how you love. My flesh fails miserably at grasping the fullness of your love, God. May you give me this desire of my heart, that your love radiate a portrait of your steadfast, sacrificing, never-ending love for you and for others. In my weakness to love, may your love prove to be all that I cannot. Amen.

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Awakened to the Love of Jesus Christ

I am lovesick. I sit here in the stillness of the morning and my heart is sustained by my Healer. He revives me in the dawn as His breath blows a fresh air into these lungs. The Spirit of God quickens my life, empowering and invigorating me to do in Jesus’ Name what cannot be done by human flesh and blood alone. I can taste His sweet Spirit in the gentle breezes.

When I’m weak and defeated, God infuses a strength wholly beyond me. He puts iron in a weary and worn out soul. The fire of Christ is in my bones. I ask Him to pour out His Spirit on me in ways that exceed what He’s done in the past and vastly glorify His Name. He is forever faithful to His Word and I desire nothing more than to bring glory to Christ, to be used by Him to extend the outreach of His powerful hand, and to serve in His merciful Name.

I deliberately enter into a fresh season and invite Jesus to do something brand new in me and thank Him in advance for what He has planned. His ways are always right. Always fitting. I am filled with a childlike enthusiasm. Without having a clue what is ahead, I can have unshakable confidence that God will be good to me. He holds me securely in the palm of His hand.

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Love Is More Important Than Being Right

I am a resilient, stubborn woman. The thing with stubbornness is that it can be confused with a nobler trait called ‘persistence’. The difference is, this belligerent behavior actually ruins relationships. And here’s what I’m now starting to realize: Loving others is more important than being ‘right’. 

The other day, I posted a moral statement online. Many friends agreed with the post, but one person did not and told the world that no one was going to change her mind. My emotions couldn’t believe the audacity of this person’s comment because I knew about their private life. Leading with my emotions to prove that I was right, I privately texted this person and said ‘how can you say such a thing when…’. I was in the wrong and clearly not loving this girl while trying to prove myself right. Sadly, this wasn’t the first time I’ve acted in this way. I have a rap sheet of defending what is right, versus being a defender of love.

Jesus delivered the raw truth. He never compromised or backed down from the hard stuff… but his final breath was love. Love meets people where they are at, in their sin. When we choose to go there, I believe we discover exceptional beauty in the image each person is created in, instead of the one we’d like them to be.

It’s difficult though because the closer you get to God, the more you see ‘wrong’ with the world. In the purity of God’s presence, it can seem unbearable to accept humanity in it’s fallen state at times. But then I look in the mirror and see a sinner, far filthier than any friend, with planks that jut deeper than the eye can see. I feel His sharp conviction cut me down to size as I recognize my flaws that go a mile deep and ten thousand miles wide, my moments of disgusting delight in a second of sin, my heart that hardens from hurt and heals crooked at times. I’m stuck in the struggle to be more Christlike without condemnation, seeking righteousness without preaching my own ‘right’ness.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never ends. 1 Corinthians 13:7-8

When God’s unfailing love gets inside you, it transforms the fear of being wrong into an agent of free-flowing love. Our hearts begin to conform to the consuming love of Christ and unconditional love for others becomes our focus. There is nothing more freeing than denying our own agenda and desiring to love without limits… like Jesus.

Lord, free my heart and let me choose love when my fleshly tendency is to be right. I get so wrapped up in small minded living; I even start to judge myself and others by the standards I set, not realizing these requirements are higher than yours. Your love is always deep enough and wide enough to engulf me wherever I am. It does not change or diminish regardless of my choices or consequences. It follows me into the depths and darkest parts. Transform my heart to be a reflection of this kind of unfathomable love. When other people stop loving, renew a steadfast spirit in me to keep on choosing love. Amen.

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Desperate, Even When It’s All Good

Sometimes the easiest moment to be on our knees, crying out for Jesus, is during the times when we have nowhere else to turn. It’s no wonder why we have seasons where we find ourselves in this place more often than not. Could it be that our loving Father wants to get close with His beloved and our trials seem to be when He can get our attention?

One of the more difficult times to be desperate for the Almighty God is when our needs have been ‘met’ and our situation is satisfied by our standards. We’re quick to toss up a praise for our circumstance when it’s good, but rarely make it to the floor in humble thankfulness to the Lord, and the seeking of His will with these blessings. Our gratitude might sound something like this, ”thank you God for your provision and giving this great thing to me. Sorry to cut our time short, but I’m really busy right now and gotta get back to my great things, so I’ll talk to you later.” You and I know the rest of that story; later doesn’t come until much, much later. Our pride tells us we deserve goodness and when God is ready to give it, we will already know what to do with it.

How can we lose sight of the depths of desperation and brokenness in our soul so quickly when all we’ve gained is merely ‘the world’? May I encourage you when the weight of sorrow, the sting of rejection, the pain of being alone or defeated in every way has been lifted from your life, cry out to Jesus. When you are showered with blessings, your heart experiences joy, your mind renewed, all goodness restored, get desperate for the deeper things of God. 

God, I wanna live desperate for you. You are the only true desire of my heart. Help me to live in a way that if you don’t show up, my life as I know it will be over, done, ruined. I need you Jesus. Be that gentle reminder when my heart starts to stray, my mind begins to forget, or when my walk looks more like pride than your merciful grace. I love you Lord. Let me be ever seeking and finding you all the days of my life. Amen. 

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How to Know if You’re a Controlling Person

Written by Donald Miller

If you’d have told me a month ago I had codependent tendencies, I’d never have believed you.

I don’t like it when people try to control me (especially indirectly through manipulation) and I’d have sworn I don’t do a thing to try to control others. But it turns out that isn’t true. For all I know, I might even be manipulating you right now. Raise your hand if you think I’m trying to control you. (I see that hand. Now put it down. Now scratch your nose.)

I realized I was a controlling person not long ago when a therapist caught me in the act. I was wondering out loud why a friend was doing what she was doing and the thearpist questioned why I was trying to get inside somebody else’s head.

“What does it matter why people do what they do? Are you trying to predict behavior to gain a sense of security?”

It was a terrific observation. Trying to figure out why people are doing what they are doing is a preface to trying to control or influence them indirectly. If I really wanted to know why they were doing what they were doing, I could just ask. But I didn’t want to ask because it was none of my business. They had a right to think and do as they wished.

Turns out controlling tendencies can hide anywhere.

And most of the time (if not all the time) we don’t know we’re doing it.

The therapist went on to explain how relationships should work. She put three large couch pillows on the floor and stood on one of the outside cushions. She then had me stand on the other outside cushion so there was an empty cushion between us.

*Photo Credit: BillDamon, Creative Commons

*Photo Credit: BillDamon, Creative Commons

“This is my pillow” she said, “and that is yours. This is my life and that is yours. The pillow in the middle represents our relationship. So, my responsibility is all about the pillow I’m standing on and yours is about yours. Together, we are responsible for the relationship. But at no point should I be stepping on your pillow.”

What she meant by that was this:

I can’t change anybody. I can’t force them or guilt them or shame them into doing anything. All I can do is stay on my pillow and ask myself whether or not I like the relationship. If I don’t, I can tell the other person what I want in a relationship and see if they want the same thing. If not, I move on, and so do they.

In marriage, of course, it’s much harder. You can’t just walk away. But in business relationships and friendships, and even in dating, the model works quite well.

I found the metaphor freeing, actually. No more wishing people would change or explaining “if they only did it this way we would be better friends.” Instead, I just say “this relationship doesn’t work” and there’s nothing I can do about it. If I’ve explained what I want in a relationship but the other person isn’t on board, no harm no foul.

It’s difficult in some relationships, I know, because sometimes you have to watch people destroy their lives, but that’s just the point. Their lives are theirs to destroy.

I found the principle to be true in business, too.

When somebody tries to sell a little too hard, they are on my pillow so I back off or set better boundaries. It’s also a great way to find and enter into relationships with clients. If they want what you’re selling, great, and if not, that’s also great. Business relationships work better when they’re natural and not forced and everybody stays on their pillow.

And in my spiritual life it’s the same. If somebody is giving me a guilt trip, they’re on my pillow. I believe much of evangelicalism is influenced by leaders who don’t realize they are standing all over their congregation’s pillows. Some leaders feel incredibly insecure unless they are managing the lives of everybody around them. Make no mistake, this isn’t strength, it’s incredible weakness. Just tell the truth, explain the consequences, and let people make their own decisions.

Here are a few ways to know whether you might be a controlling person:

1 You imagine a life in which somebody else was different, and indirectly try to affect their change.
1 You get angry when things aren’t going your way and you let people know it.
1 You can only be surrounded by people who are submissive to you.
1 You give the silent treatment to people you are angry with.
1 You are often tempted to show somebody the errors they don’t see in themselves.

What ways do you tend to step on other people’s pillows? Do you shame people (I’m guilty of that) or give them the silent treatment? How do you try to influence others without being direct or when their lives are none of your business?

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Extinguish Fear Once and For All

Have you ever found yourself surrounded by a powerful enemy army, no matter which step you take, he is there to snatch you up. Recently, I had been in this battle where I felt so handicapped by fear that I didn’t want to step out of the house or online. I was believing the enemy’s lie that my life was limited by his destructive schemes. Sometimes the battle is not for you to fight, sometimes it is God’s. However, we must position ourselves in this confidence of Christ and throw down the spirit of fear of the enemy. We must be still, fill our hearts with the Truth and see the salvation of the Lord.

If you’re facing fear in your life, hold tight to God’s Truth and know that He is right there with you in the midst of your struggle. He’s given you His Word to encourage you in the walk. Here are some scriptures to face your fears with God’s victory! I hope this will be potent ammunition in your battle as you fight the good fight of faith as more than a conqueror. This victory is yours because the Spirit dwells in you if you have trusted Jesus as your personal Savior. I read these words out loud and declared them in my prayers. Start by thanking Him with complete assurance, knowing that what you’re asking is already on its way.

Whatever your circumstance may be (financial, relational, vocational), pray these scriptures over your life and for the strength to be courageous and filled with faith to the glory of His Name! Be vigilant and disciplined until the word is so ingrained in memory that they fall from your lips in prayer.

Here are a few. You can find more on a separate page I’ve created here on my blog for more scriptures references.

I sought the Lord, and He answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Psalm 34:4

Now this is what the Lord says – the One who created you, Jacob, and the One who formed you, Israel – “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine.” Isaiah 43:1

He is to say to them: “Listen, Israel: Today you are about to engage in battle with your enemies. Do not be cowardly. Do not be afraid, alarmed, or terrified because of them.” Deuteronomy 20:3

He will not fear bad news; his heart is confident, trusting in the Lord. Psalm 112:7

His heart is assured; he will not fear. In the end he will look in triumph on his foes. Psalm 112:8

Be strong and courageous; don’t be terrified or afraid of them. For it is the Lord your God who goes with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Deuteronomy 31:6

The Lord is my light and my salvation – Whom should I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom should I be afraid? Psalm 27:1

The Angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear Him, and rescues them. Psalm 34:7

In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not fear. What can man do to me? Psalm 56:4

Fear no more, Daughter Zion. Look, your King is coming. John 12:15

“Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Your heart must not be troubled or fearful.” John 14:27

Heavenly Father, even right now, I am reminded and made so aware of your joyous deliverance from the enemy’s attempts to strike up fear. You are my King who rescues in times of need, my Prince of Peace when the storms rage on, the one, true Almighty God who has claimed victory and promised us eternity. My Abba Father has set up His protection all around me. I have nothing to fear. I am secure in the shadow of your wings. Infuse my mind with your Word and let me hold fast to your truths.

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Building Faith For The Future

Sometimes our circumstances can cause anxiety but what I’m here to remind you is that despite the outward situation, our good and loving Father will always bring something better out from the ruins that gives all glory back to God for something so marvelous. Most of the time, His work is being done in us during the ‘wait’ for a physical condition to change. This time of patience and trust in Him builds a faith for the future.

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? (Matthew 6:25)

It scares us to lose these necessities, but honestly, most of us don’t consume the basics of these needs. We buy into the pleasures of food and clothing and what frightens us most about losing them is that we would lose some human praise or admiring glances if we didn’t have nice clothes and that our taste buds would miss the rich flavor of certain foods.

And to this Jesus responds: If you are gripped by anxiety over these things, you have lost sight of the greatness of life. Life was not given primarily for physical pleasures or the approval of man, but for something greater—the enjoyment of God. The things of this world can not provide the greater things of life—the pursuit of God’s gracious favor, the love and joy of His spirit and the hope of eternity in His presence.

There’s another problem with anxiety though; it leads to sinful actions and attitudes. Anxiety about finances can cause coveting, greed, hoarding and stealing. Anxiety about succeeding at something can make you irritable and abrupt. Anxiety about relationships can make you withdrawn, indifferent and uncaring about other people. Anxiety about how someone will respond to you can make you cover over the truth and lie about things. If worry could be conquered, a lot of sins would be overcome.

Here are some reminders from Jesus and Paul about God’s promises to battle unbelief:

“Fear not for I am with you, be not dismayed for I am your God; I will help you, I will strengthen you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand” (Isaiah 41:10).

“So shall my word that goes forth from my mouth; it will not come back to me empty but accomplish that which I purpose, and prosper in the thing for which I sent it” (Isaiah 55:11).

“My grace is sufficient for you, my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9).

“As your days so shall your strength be” (Deuteronomy 33:25).

“I will instruct you and teach you the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you” (Psalm 32:8).

“If God is for us who can be against us!” (Romans 8:31).

“…suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” (Romans 5:3–5).

“Even to your old age I am he, and to gray hairs I will carry you. I have made, and I will bear; I will carry and will save” (Isaiah 46:4).

“none of us lives to himself and none of us dies to himself; if we live we live to the Lord and if we die we die to the Lord. So whether we live or die we are the Lord’s. For to this end Christ died and rose again: that he might be Lord both of the dead and the living” (Romans 14:8–9).

“He who began a good work in you will complete it unto the day of Christ” (Philippians 1:6).

“He who calls you is faithful. He will do it” (1 Thessalonians 5:23).

“He is able for all time to save those who draw near to God through him, since he always lives to make intercession for them” (Hebrews 7:25).

Rest on the promises of God and find your security in His Truth. I pray you find peace as you look back at your own testimony and see that He’s never let you go yet. Time after time, our great Provider has been there holding your hand, sometimes carrying you through it. My hope is that His word will reign supreme in your heart and mind as comfort that He will never let you go. Your solid stance on the Rock will keep you steady, though the winds may blow, you cannot be carried away with the shifting sands. When you wake up on the other side, you will see that just as He provided a way in this situation, He will also do it again and again and again. He is greater than your circumstance! Believe it and let Him build your faith for an even greater future.

Excerpts from Battling Unbelief by John Piper.